Reasons – you always find them. Reasons to live, reasons to die, reasons to not get out of the bed on Monday mornings and reasons to not go to bed on Sunday nights. Reasons to fight, to be together, to eat what you like even when you’re not supposed to, to not eat what you don’t like even if you’re supposed to.
Reasons – looks like I always have them, in abundance, to not write. To not write regularly, to not develop this “hobby” of mine which I had committed myself to, to which I owe my intellectual ressurrection, a hobby that I had decided never to abandon ever again.
I took years together to be able to decide what to write on, and then months together to decide on the design, look and feel of this blog. And just when I had gathered enough readers whom I started befriending, I found a reason called ‘pursuit of love’ and abandoned writing. And then, I was back with a bang, declared that I’m committed to writing regularly now that life is back to normalcy. And then? I disappear!
Yes, there are many reasons I can jot down that can back me up. Weekends are spent with the girlfriend, I only write on a private blog that I share with my girlfriend, I play badminton during weekends and am tired, I have too much of work during weekdays, I don’t have a proper keyboard, I am articulalting the blogs in my mind, I don’t feel inspired, I was waiting for my company to approve my request to own and monetize the blog, yada, yada, yada..
The truth is – I’m lazy. I tend to abandon things that I start unless something is at stake. If that something is money, I’d care the least. It has to be something important – a relationship, respect etc.
So, I did have this guilt inside me, mockig my conscience that I’m not being fair to my readers and myself. It’d be unfair to me if I abandon writing here, all that effort I put in over the last couple of years in bringing this blog to the little that it’s today would just be worth nothing.
It’d be unfair to my readers – the readers who backed me up, read my stuff, kept me motivated and are still reading my posts, even though I’ve been away from this world for a really long time. A humble thank you and a heartfelt sorry. I bow to thee! My Readers! I’m indebted and touched at this gesture.
I’ll write more, I promise!
P.S. – I’m already hoping I can live up to that last statement! 😉